What about NOW?!

I am pretty sure what I was saying (ok, yelling) in her ear was "pick up the bar NOW - #letsgo!" 

Every rep counts - go - one more time, etc etc!

WHY?  

Would she be ok if she didn't get one more rep?  

Would she still have "done well" and "gotten a good workout"? 

Would she still be working to be fitter, better, stronger than the day before? 

Yes, yes, and yes

BUT - I know Jaime isn't working to be "ok" or "stonger than yesterday" - she - like most of you -  is working to be the BEST and that means action NOW!

How does this apply to you? Your family life - your job - your personal goals?  

It's not only about doing the work its about how we do the work.

1) with a PMA (positive mental attitude) - an attitude of "say YES"

2) with a sense of URGENCY

URGENCY inspires ACTION - Action creates RESULTS - Results inspire HOPE  - WINNING,etc.

A True Sense of Urgency

Without a sense of urgency, desire loses its value.
                                                                 - Jim Rohn

The dictionary tells us that urgency means “of pressing importance.” When people have a true sense of urgency, they think that action on critical issues is needed now, not eventually, not when it fits easily into a schedule. "Now" means making real progress every single day. "Critically important" means challenges that are central to success or survival, winning or losing. A sense of urgency is not an attitude that I must have the project team meeting today, but that the meeting must accomplish something important today.

Urgent behavior is not driven by a belief that all is well, or that everything is a mess but instead, that the world contains great opportunities and great hazards. Even more so, urgent action is not created by feelings of contentment, anxiety, frustration, or anger, but by a gut-level determination to move and win, now. These feelings quite naturally lead to behavior in which people are alert and proactive, in which they constantly scan the environment around them, both inside and outside their organizations, looking for information relevant to success and survival. With complacency or false urgency, people look inward, not out, and they miss what is essential for prosperity.

With a real sense of urgency, when people see an opportunity or a problem of significance to their organization, and others don’t, they quite naturally search for effective ways to get the information to the right individual — right away — not when they are next scheduled to meet with him or her next month. With a true sense of urgency, people want to come to work each day ready to cooperate energetically and responsively with intelligent initiatives from others. And they do. People want to find ways to launch smart initiatives. And they do.

A real sense of urgency is a highly positive and highly focused force. Because it naturally directs you to be truly alert to what’s really happening, it rarely leads to a race to deal with the trivial, to pursue pet projects of minor significance to the larger organization, or to tackle important issues in uninformed, potentially dangerous ways.

It is often believed that people cannot maintain a high sense of urgency over a prolonged period of time, without burnout. Yet, with all the alertness, initiative, and speed, true urgency doesn’t produce dangerous levels of stress because it motivates people to find ways to rid themselves of chores that add little value to their organizations. People who are determined to move and win, now, simply do not waste time or add stress by engaging in irrelevant or business-as-usual activities.

Complacency is pervasive, in part because it simply is not seen, even by many smart, experienced, and sophisticated people. A false sense of urgency is pervasive and insidious because people mistake activity for productivity. True urgency is not the product of historical successes or current failures but the result of people, up and down the hierarchy, who provide the leadership needed to create and re-create this increasingly important asset. A real sense of urgency is rare, much rarer than most people seem to think. Yet it is invaluable in a world that will not stand still. 

#letsgo 2014

Goals - Mantras - Vision Boards - Scribbles on my mirror?  YES  - all of it a lot!  It's the little things that you fill your brain with that make you who you are today, right now.

Each year I've shared a Mantra with y'all. The last 3 years my Mantras have come easily - they were powerful and fitting from the start.  This year, I struggled a bit to come up with something that motivated me - was an instant "state changer" when I said it - and that fit things happening in my life.

I have two or three pages of notes and ideas that I planned to turn into my 2014 Mantra but none really stuck and I kept saying #letsgo - let's go - let's go - let's go!!!!!  This seem to fit for family - training - personal - professional - EVERYTHING!

I am a "here and now" kind of person.  While I have goals and "things" I strive for (and yes, I am a planner)...but I am not blessed with the gift of VISION or FUTURIST like my sister in law, Carey or my husband, Jeremy.  They are two people who seem to "see the future"- they understand the big picture - the where we're going and why - the possibility of actions today.  I, on the other hand, cannot SEE those things

I simply BELIEVE in them.
I believe I will be successful
I believe in the people around me
I believe in a forever marriage
I believe in happiness
I believe in God
I believe in anything is possible

I may not know what success or happiness IS - I do not know the struggle and triumph that comes with a forever marriage - I do not know how to do the impossible (ie: conquer bulimia, have a child!)

But I do now ACTION KILLS FEAR and that you can't move forward without taking a step - even if that's a baby step!  So  - #LETSGO

#LETSGO - reminds me of The Slight Edge - that everything counts - all the little things make the big things happen.  No matter what, when, where, why #letsgo - do whatever the next step is for you!


Happy 2014 - May big things happen for you all!

How many times can you "Start Over"?

AS MANY FREAKIN' TIMES AS IT TAKES - especially when it comes to conquering your eating disorder - or simply making difficult nutrition changes.

I love that you guys and gals continue to reach out for support as you're stuggling with eating disorders.  There is no magic cure that I know of - like anything, it's a process and can be a bumpy road. 

I dont' know if this will help but here is a checklist that I have used to "reset" myself after a binge.


1. Don’t starve yourself. Eat. I know it sounds counterintuitive, but fasting after a binge will only make you severely hungry, which can easily lead to another binge. Stop the cycle. Drink lots of water. Lots of veggies and lean protein works best for me. You can’t change the past, but you can prepare for your present and future by feeding yourself whole, healthy foods to prevent a future binge.

2. Forgive yourself.  Be very, very kind to yourself: Beating yourself up or criticizing yourself won’t make you change. Compassion and regret (not shame – there is a difference!) can. Create an affirmation that makes you feel better or write down what progress you've made.

3. Move the emotions through your body. Take 10-15 minutes to "let it out" - walk, write, cry - just don't stuff the feelings you have about your binge. Again, find a routine that works for you - that clears your mind and helps you reset. Take a bath - meditate - you get the idea! I use to go for walks and tell myself all the reasons it was "gonna be ok" - Also, prayer works!

4. Have a starting over ritual. Showering, bathing, walking, brushing your teeth: any thing that signals to you that you are starting over, starting afresh or anew is helpful after a slip. Writing out my feelings is part of my ritual. I get out my notebook and write down: “I am angry…,” “I am sad/regretful…”, “I am frustrated…” This emotional housecleaning feels so good. When I was bulemic I sometimes "started over" 6 times a day!!!!!

5. Get back on track as soon as you can. When you slip up with a sugar binge, you usually have terrible sugar cravings for the next 3 or 4 days. If you are trying to get back on track, do what you need to do to support yourself through the sugar cravings. Outside support is often crucial. I would tell my family, “Lisa, slipped up and had some granola last night. Can you help me by encouraging me over the next few days? I’ll be craving sugar and could use some extra help.” Plan your food and set yourself up for success.

6. Offer yourself comfort. When you’re feeling remorseful about overeating, you don’t need to berate yourself any further. You already feel badly enough about bingeing. What you need is comfort, compassion and kindness so that you can objectively look at what happened and find ways to act differently the next time. In my experience, this is the difference between blame and learning.

7. Move out of your head and get support. We tend to distance ourselves from friends and loved ones when we’re overeating or when we’ve made a mistake. We feel ashamed for being imperfect, so we try and hide it. . Talk to a friend or journal. I was too ashamed to talk to anyone, so I turned to journaling but ideally sharing is best! It’s easy to delve into overthinking, where you get trapped into a mental rut, going over and over something in your mind. Telling/writing your story stops the spin cycle and enables you to find the exit ramp.

8. Give yourself self acceptance. It’s easy to offer yourself approval when you’re on your “best” behavior. But what about when you’ve been overeating? Do you offer yourself love and support at those times, as well? How would you treat a friend who called you with the same experience? What would you say to them? Now, give yourself that same treatment!

9. When you’re ready, examine what happened. Binges are fabulous learning opportunities. Try and examine what was going on: how were you feeling beforehand? What thoughts were running through your head? What expectations or shoulds ran the show? Write about the event and see if you can make sense of it. This can help you prepare for the next time. Think of how you can support yourself next time so that you can act differently. Identify your triggers.

10. Identify areas of progress. After binges we often can't think of anything that is going well or that we've made progress in. After completing the steps above you should have a clearer head and be able to see the you beyond the binge. Take a few minutes to focus on your progress or on what is going right in your life. Choose 5 things that are "working" in your life and write them on your bathroom mirror.


Make Goals - Goals -Goals - write them down! Make them realistic and know they won't happen over night.

Also, I strongly suggest getting the Power of Postive Thinking by Norman Vincent Peale. Implement at least 3 things into your routine ASAP.

You don't understand - I DON"T want to do this!

For years I kept my eating disorder a secret - partly out of embarrassment and partly out of the fact that "no one" will understand. NO ONE except maybe ALL of YOU out there who are dealing or have dealt with anorexia or bulimia. E.D.s are a crazy thing that take over and make you do things that don't make sense even to the person doing them.

I can remember many drives home from high school - crying - talking myself out of doing the inevitable.....devouring boxes of cereal and loaves of bread only to throw them up, head out the door for a run, then off to wait tables for the evening! I hated it so why did I do it?


It's not about the food - it's not about self discipline - it's about being in control - about numbing yourself from whatever it is for just a few minutes - it becomes a habit.
Habits are hard to break, especially when they are linked to your self worth.


Since my last blog, What's in my food log? - many of you have reached out for help or to share stories. I am not a therapist and what worked for me may not work for you. It's hard to know where to start so I am just picking one thing that may help you get closer to recovery.

Identify your Triggers

Start a log of the following:

What are you DOING when E.D. comes knocking on your door?

Is it after school/work each day? Is it Friday night when you don't have plans with friends? Is it Sunday afternoon when you're blue and lonely?

Start to notice patterns in days, times, and events that trigger E.D. thoughts.

What are you FEELING when E.D. creeps back into your life?

Do you want to binge/purge when you're bored? Is it when you're angry? Is purging your way of dealing with being overwhelmed? Do you feel helpless or out of control at work and respond by binging? Is it because you're lonely?

Start to notice feelings that trigger your escape via your eating disorder.

Does E.D. punish you for not being PERFECT?

Do you make a less than perfect presentation and punish yourself? Do you have 1 extra bite of nacho and decide "all is lost" so you fall into the rabbit hole of binging? Do you hate something about yourself so much - you must deserve this? Is it simply the TYPE of food that you eat that triggers the binge ie: pasta or cake?

Start to notice if your E.D. is a act AGAINST you!

Now what!?!

Identifying your triggers won't stop your actions. However, it can give you the access to avoiding situations or foods that set you off. It can also help you start to make plans and choices that break your habit. For example, if you know that coming home to an empty house after work is a trigger - join a 5:30pm CrossFit class, make dinner plans with friends, etc. If you know that having a terrible sales presentation is a trigger - call a friend, take your dog for a walk.

For me, binging and purging was a reaction to being overwhelmed! Anytime, I felt I had too much to handle or take on - I used E.D. as a drug to numb. While you're in the midst of an episode there is nothing else in the world. At one time in my life that was better than dealing with whatever I was overwhelmed by.

You'll find that often the desire to self destruct disappears and you're left with one huge ACCOMPLISHMENT - finding another way to deal with your feelings!

Give yourself a break - you're gonna have tough days but if identifying your triggers gets rid of just a few of your episodes. What do you really have to lose?

What's in my food log?

I've kept a food log almost everyday since I was in high school. At one time it was part of my obsessive compulsive eating disorder. When I was anorexic, I logged only the number of fat grams I had eaten each day (limiting myself to 10) Later it became a mark of how many times in a day I purged (up to 5 times a day). At some point I stopped logging the purges and "bad days" and the log became a record of the good days in which I didn't purge at all (some months there were only 2 of these days). College and post college the logs transitioned into workout and food logs to make sure my calories IN were LESS than the calories OUT via long, masochistic exercise sessions.

It makes me tear up to even think about those logs - those days of torment and being controlled rather than in control. With every move, I've packed those logs in a trunk and lugged them with me. Today could pull them out and show you the path I've traveled with food.

Recently several people have asked, what does your food log look like? what do you eat? may I have a copy of your food log? etc.
I sat down to give 3 example days of "what's in my food log" - but it won't tell the whole story.
The truth is that it's taken over 4 yrs to get the body I have today, to transition to the food you'll see in my food log, to have the peace of mind to eat Amy's Ice Cream and NOT get up to "run it off" in the morning. And MY food log should not be YOUR food log.

The truth today:

• I don't really cheat - it's not worth it to me anymore and I don't miss anything!
  
• I eat 99% paleo, gluten free, dairy free
  
• I don't overeat because it reminds me of my days trapped in a Bulimic prison
• I eat for performance and log everything - even on vacations
• I still enjoy wine, Mexican Martini's, sweets on occasion
• I know my Zone blocks but don't zone each meal just end of the day totals
  

Today I still log my workouts and my food EVERYDAY. I do it to track performance, to remember PR's, to know how I feel when I fuel my body in certain ways. I write down hunger/energy/body aches/rita's I have at happy hour - ALL OF IT. My food log is my peace of mind - Write it down and it's one less thing taking up space in my head!